Nadine Feldman, Author

celebrating strong female characters and whatever else strikes my fancy

books

One More Walk with Julia

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She looked sad as she moved to the front of the room. For a moment I thought I saw tears in her eyes. Turns out I was right. As author and teacher Julia Cameron took the stage, she opened by telling us about a long-time colleague of hers who had died two days before. She asked us to send prayers and then bravely began the weekend workshop.

This is the level of authenticity I have respected and admired for more than twenty years. Julia has written more than forty books, and she has never tried to present her life as perfect. In her searing memoir Floor Sample, for example, she details her challenges with mental health issues. Yet her honesty never feels self-serving or pitying. It’s life, baby, and the cure for the pain is self-compassion and making art. On that she never waivers.

Having practiced The Artist’s Way all these years, I have experience firsthand how it changes lives. When I first pulled the book off the shelf in the summer of 1997, I was a writer who didn’t know how to start writing. Previous attempts had resulted in a great deal of creative wounding, even from so-called writing teachers.

Seeing Julia again (my third time), I was still surprised at how the simple tools of Morning Pages, Artist Dates, and fill in the blank exercises could pull so much out of me. Late in the weekend I felt breathless, stripped bare. Several days later, I am still processing what happened, noticing subtle and not-so-subtle shifts…everything from deciding to order a decent blender to digging in deeper to my novel-in-progress.

As a long-time veteran, I was pleased to meet so many people who were new to the book. Some had been given a copy years before and felt like the time is now. I was able to share the many changes life had brought as a result of doing this work: several books, with more in process; a college degree at age 45; multiple new interests, including gardening; an amicable divorce (a direct result of doing Morning Pages); and a happier, healthier marriage.

For an entire weekend I got to have “real” conversations with people, tossing aside small talk and pretense in favor of what was in our hearts. We laughed, we cried, we hugged, and we rooted for each other’s success, regardless of our chosen art form(s).

At the end of the weekend, I felt renewed. And Julia no longer looked sad. Her blue eyes were bright and merry in spite of her grief.

For me, the workshop was a chance to see the master in action once again, and to bring my love and gratitude. I came to The Artist’s Way because I wanted to write. What I gained was that and so much more.

Delight!

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When the Fair Folk, the Fae, the Fairies, showed up in the manuscript for Factory Girl, my first impulse was to shoo them away. I had an idea of what the story was about, especially since it is based in part on an actual life.

But the magic of the Fae will not be denied. As with other stories I have written, the story that wants to be told will stomp its feet and hold its breath until I pay attention. Woe be to me when I do not!

As I have finally surrendered to this development, I have moved beyond researching Scottish folk tales and into the play of it. I ordered fairy houses and other delights for my new garden. I am enjoying The Faerie Handbook: An Enchanting Compendium of Literature, Lore, Art, Recipes, and Projects by the editors of Faerie Magazine (now called Enchanted Living). Yes, there is a magazine! Who knew? I’m also reading Faeries by Brian Froud and Alan Lee, filled with art and essays about the Fair Folk.

These new activities are activating something unusual in my ordinarily serious nature: delight. At 60, it appears I am finally reclaiming the joy of childhood.

Yesterday I added some text to Factory Girl where Jane sprouts wings for the first time. It was an extraordinary moment for me. Jane’s life is filled with challenges, and Factory Girl takes a hard look at life in industrial 19th-century Scotland. The magic of Factory Girl does not diminish the harsh realities or even make them easier to bear. Rather, it is about the curious thing that happens in our lives when great sorrow and great joy coexist side by side with each other.

Delight is not about ignoring the suffering of the world. It is about finding that which is beautiful so ugliness does not consume us. It is about finding joy that resides within us even when life is hard. It appears I still have much to learn from the Fae. I’m so looking forward to share with you what they are sharing with me!

Writer Updates #amwriting #womensfiction

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I continue to read, read, read, but I am refilling my well with new books. Not to worry, there are plenty of good ones out there! No doubt next week I’ll be back to share my latest good reads.

In the meantime, I thought I’d share an update on my own work.

I’m revising two separate projects, both of them very different, and I’m having a wonderful time! First is Factory Girl, set in late nineteenth-century Scotland. Though the inspiration for the book is my great-great grandmother, Factory Girl includes a fairy rebellion as well! It wasn’t my intention, but they showed up in my story, and I decided to let them stay.

The other is untitled as yet. It’s a contemporary women’s fiction work about Elaine, a 60-year-old woman who has been the rock, support, and head cheerleader for her family, but who now wants to explore her own dreams. With a husband who has decided to jump into politics and a daughter who drops off the grandson without much notice, Elaine is meeting a fair amount of resistance! There’s also a handsome art teacher and an untrustworthy friend in the mix. I just finished the second draft, so this may take a while, but it’s a promising project.

Meanwhile, we continue to try to sell our home in the Pacific Northwest so we can move full-time to the East Coast. So far, the market is oddly quiet, so our move date remains uncertain. But these are good problems to have! In the meantime we’re enjoying a summer that is generally mild and pleasant (with the exception of air quality — we’re affected by fires in British Colombia), and I’m getting lots of yummy fruit from the garden.

See you next week!

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Nadine’s latest novel, What She Knew, is available on Amazon.

The Power of a Plant #bookreview #memoir

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If you’re a longtime reader of this blog, you know I love to garden. It’s summer in the Pacific Northwest, and I just took my third load of juicy plums to the food bank. When I’m not writing fiction, you’ll find me outside growing things, and there’s nothing I love more than sharing fresh, organic food with people.

I am also a big fan of Donorschoose.org, an organization we have supported for many years. When we put on our NYC hats in the fall and winter, I also work in their offices. Recently I noticed a post (on Twitter, I think) that referenced South Bronx teacher Stephen Ritz, who has created a gardening revolution, using gardening to teach students a variety of subjects.

Stephen, as it turns out, has a book…so of course I bought it. While I normally stick to reviewing fiction here, I can’t help but share this book. If you are feeling uninspired about the state of the world today, Stephen Ritz and co-author Suzie Boss will lift you up.

The Power of a Plant: A Teacher’s Odyssey to Grow Healthy Minds and Schools tells the story of a chance occurrence in his classroom one day, where the sudden appearance of daffodils broke up a fight, that led Ritz down his current path.

Prior to this event, Ritz had no gardening experience, but he always “knew a guy,” and thus found people to learn from. Through the lens of gardening, he taught math, science, and the importance of healthy eating. Along the way he managed to lose 100 pounds himself as he changed his own eating habits. He heads up the Green Bronx Machine, and his students have met the White House chef under Obama and received numerous awards for their work. Not too shabby for students who live in the poorest congressional district in the nation!

If you get a chance to see Stephen Ritz on YouTube, you’ll find a man larger than life, filled with such passion he appears almost as a madman, with flailing arms and bugging eyes. He is, quite literally, a force of nature. The Power of a Plant, though bursting with his incredible energy, is also an honest reflection about his journey that doesn’t shy away from his mistakes and political battles with school officials.

Reading his frustrations, I am reminded that sometimes in the garden, when a plant isn’t doing well, the solution is to move it to another spot where the light and moisture are more suited. Ritz had to make several moves to find a place where he wouldn’t feel stifled by school politics and other bureaucratic problems.

You don’t have to be a gardener to appreciate the changes he has wrought in the last decade-plus. This is a story to remind us we can all make a difference. Reading it, you may recall teachers who affected your lives as well.

Ritz still bases from the Bronx but travels the world lecturing and sharing his vision. From planting seeds in a single classroom he is now changing the world. We could all do well to learn from his example.

The Butterfly Garden #bookreview #fiction

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What a sweet title! One would expect a lovely story about a group of women sipping tea in a butterfly garden. Yet this butterfly garden is unlike any other. This garden is created by a serial killer who decorates his young, lovely victims with butterfly tattoos.

I’m not even sure why I bought The Butterfly Garden. I always read the descriptions and it’s unlike me to purchase something so grisly and disturbing. But I’m glad I did.

Author Dot Hutchison begins the story in a police station where a young woman called Maya is being questioned. Maya is a tough young woman who isn’t exactly forthcoming at the beginning, so there is some question as to whether she is somehow complicit in a series of gruesome murders performed by a man known only as The Gardener. Drip by drip, word by word, she tells the story of the Garden and the young women in it: women The Gardener kidnapped, tattooed, killed, and preserved because butterflies have a short life span.

The Gardener has a lot of contradictions. He can be charming, loving even. In fact, everything he does is out of love, even when he’s at his most twisted and brutal.

The interplay between Maya and the detectives, Hanoverian and Eddison, helps bring the story to life. Through the telling of the story, we learn more about these detectives and what motivates them to continue working in a field that can be exhausting, frustrating, and draining. Since The Butterfly Garden is the first in a series, one presumes we will continue to follow the detectives in future books.

This type of story normally isn’t my cup of tea, but I have to say I liked it very much. Maya emerged from her cocoon, as it were, as the story unfolds, and I found myself aching for the lost years (and lives) of these fictional characters.

Legacy of Hunger #bookreview #historicalfiction

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Legacy of Hunger by Christy Nicholas is set in Ireland during its famine, and combines history with fantasy…a wonderful combination when it comes to stories set in the Celtic countries. It is the first book in a three-book series.

Valentia is an independent young woman who travels to Ireland in search of her family and a brooch she has only seen drawings of. Perils await as she travels overseas and visits her ancestral home. I don’t want to say more about this because I don’t want to include any spoilers.

Nicholas paints a moody picture of Ireland in its dire straits. Valentia, daughter of a civic-minded mother, immerses herself in the politics of the time and does her best to support those who struggled wherever she could. As she faces challenges both at sea and in Ireland, she matures in a natural, organic way.

Though there’s plenty of drama to be had, Nicholas is not graphic or over the top in her descriptions, and I like her approach. Though I like the Outlander books, for example, they are sometimes more graphic and gratuitous than I would like. Also, the fantasy element is subtle and gradual, and Nicholas includes some interesting details of Irish folklore. As a student of Irish history and folklore myself, I appreciated some of the details she included, and she did so in a way that didn’t disrupt the story itself.

A few elements near the end feel as if they are wrapped up a bit too quickly, but this is a minor detail. I am eager to continue reading the rest of the series.

On a personal note, Legacy of Hunger appealed to me because of my own work on Factory Girl, my WIP that combines historical fiction with fantasy. LoH is set in Ireland, while Factory Girl is set in Scotland, and we are both drawing from similar sources. Since I don’t normally delve into fantasy realms in my work, it’s an uncomfortable area for me, and Legacy of Hunger had the effect of giving me “permission” to continue with my revisions and to explore a path I hadn’t expected to travel.