“So, today’s February 14th?” hubby asks me as we wake up this morning.
“Yep,” I replied.
“You know what that means…Tomorrow’s payday!”
With that, the day begins. Hubby is being silly, of course, as he always is when we first wake up. He’s been known to make up songs that are odes to the coffee he’s making in the morning. Me, I’m not that perky. But I digress.
Hubby and I, as some of you know, met online nearly seven years ago. His profile read something like this: “I’m in the process of getting a divorce and I have custody of 16-year-old twins.” Real “come hither” stuff there. My girlfriends all agreed that the best thing for me to do was to stay far, far away from this guy.
Still, in between the lines I saw something else. First, I saw a guy who was honest. He didn’t try to paint a rosy picture when one didn’t exist. He didn’t lie about his marital status. And despite the obvious challenging circumstances of his life, an optimism bubbled up from his words, and I got the sense that he wasn’t a “project.” He seemed like a guy who could hold his own when the going got tough, and I liked that.
There’s only so much information we can put on those personal profiles about who we are and what we’re about. And, those profiles are a snapshot in time. We never know how a relationship will withstand all the changes that life brings. Change can bring us together or drive us apart. We have been the lucky ones.
Together we fell in love with hiking and the outdoors, leading us to our (soon) move to Washington State. Together we shepherded his children from high school through college and into young adulthood. Together we have buried three loved ones: both his parents and hubby’s best friend of thirty years. Together we have engaged creatively as he writes plays and I write books, and together we have weathered the frustrations and rejection that are a natural part of sharing our creativity with the public.
All this “together” works, I think, because we are both strong individuals with a sense of who we are as people. I don’t look to him to “make” me happy, and he doesn’t expect me to fill some missing piece inside. It’s not that we never disagree or argue, but that we are able to negotiate our disagreements with respect and consideration.
It took me 46 years to find hubby. I’m glad that I saw the deeper worth in that dating profile and ignored my girfriends’ advice. I’m glad I held out for such a delightful companion. My prayer to all of you on this Valentine’s Day is that you find peace and wholeness within yourselves…and, if you choose to be in a relationship, may you enjoy the bounty of it as I have enjoyed mine.
Thank you, Nadine! And you are very lucky 🙂
So true! I pinch myself all the time. Guess that explains the little bruises on my arms. 🙂
A lovely post. Nadine. I hope you and your hubby have a wonderful Valentine’s.
I have a wonderful companion in my husband. I didn’t get married until I was 40! Larry had been married before, and he has a daughter who was already grown when we started dating. I’m glad I waited to get married until I found him!
I love these stories! Thanks for sharing.
Brilliant story, Nadine. I love it. What a very special find. This Valentine’s Day, I’ve got my daughter, but no hubby. I’ve made peace with the fact that maybe I had my taste of a great love, and I’m glad I had it, rather than not. I may still find someone else, but, as you suggest, it has been fulfilling to find myself, feel whole with who I am, solid with me being me. I appreciate this very much, and if the future brings another love, great. If not, I have experienced wonderful love for a time, and I am… Read more »
Beautiful, Kat.
Hi, all, a strange thing just happened. A comment disappeared, and I don’t know why. If your comment didn’t appear here, it may be due to a technical glitch of some kind. Sorry for any inconvenience.
This is truly a Valentines story to cherish. When love comes knocking it is rarely packaged up as we expect it and it never comes without some sort of baggage. We have to look beyond .. if what we need is there, we’re darn lucky. Thanks for sharing, an inspiring story for us hopeless romantics.
Thanks, Brenda! Lord knows I brought plenty of my own baggage to the table!
Aw that’s great Nadine! I didn’t post my love story this year, but maybe next year. I did post my wedding photo on fb and people went crazy for it. It was my anniversary yesterday! 🙂 we are a cute couple kinda like you two!:) I’m a stepmom too. Cal is 20. Then, we have two kids together, Leo 12 and Lily 7.
I don’t think I knew you were a stepmom, too, Jodi! Very cool. Hope you had a fabulous anniversary — I need to check out that photo!
It is Jodi one of the cutest wedding photos I have ever seen!
I really love reading about happy couples. It gives me a big smile. I pray and wish for you Nadine and for Jodi, and all happy couples reading you, an endless love story 🙂