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You are here: Home / fiction / Friday Fun! How About Some Flash Fiction?

Friday Fun! How About Some Flash Fiction?

September 9, 2011 by admin

I’m participating in Rachael Harrie’s Platform-Building Challenge, and this week we were given an assignment: write a 200-word story beginning with “The door swung open” and ending with “The door swung shut.” Extra points for hitting exactly 200 words! I don’t usually write anything this short, but here’s my contribution:

***

The door swung open. A waiter, tall and trim in black slacks and matching vest, balanced a tray of food on his fingertips and glided into the dining room. His hair was more salt than pepper, though he still had plenty of it.

As he moved toward the table of six, he stopped suddenly, still holding the tray aloft over his head, and stared at the couple who had just sat down. The woman glanced up, and their eyes locked.

In an instant, he recovered and delivered the food to his table. Then he walked over to the couple. The man, absorbed in the menu, didn’t look up right away. When he did, he said, “Well, James, I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Times are hard, boss,” James said bitterly. “This is what happens to your laid-off employees.”

The boss handed James the menu. “I’ll have the steak,” he said. “Medium rare. Make sure you get it just right.”

James replied, “Of course, boss.” To the boss’s wife he added, winking, “And you’ll get a special dessert, madame.” Ignoring her reddening face, he went back to the kitchen with a small smile on his face. The door swung shut.

 

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Filed Under: fiction, writing Tagged With: fiction, flash fiction, platform-building contest, writing

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Richard Hughes
Richard Hughes
11 years ago

Nadine, that’s one clever story. Love it.

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Maria Smith (@mariaAsmith)
Maria Smith (@mariaAsmith)
11 years ago

Excellent, loved it, very well executed.

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Julie Farrar (@Julie_Farrar)
Julie Farrar (@Julie_Farrar)
11 years ago

Ok, Nadine. Waiting to see what happens next . . . and next.

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Samantha Stacia
Samantha Stacia
11 years ago

WOW! NICE! I Like the last part with the wink-there was so much in that wink!! If I had been the wife, I would have left right then!!
It’s amazing what can be done in 200 words huh? I bet you win a prize! Good Luck!!

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Samantha Stacia
Samantha Stacia
11 years ago

P.S Nadine, I finally got the post out accepting your Liebster Award and I wanted to say thank you again!
Happy Blogging!

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admin
Author
admin
11 years ago

Thanks, everyone! I appreciate your encouragement!

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Vanessa Hancock (@HancockVanessa)
Vanessa Hancock (@HancockVanessa)
11 years ago

That was great! Makes you want to clap for the guy! Thanks for visiting Sand Castles and Snow Forts. Drop by anytime.

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Robert Lee Jackson
Robert Lee Jackson
11 years ago

This is one of my favorites so far. I liked that you didn’t go for something scary like so many of the stories were. Nice topical tale with a wry twist.

Nice job!

Lee
Tossing It Out

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